Colonoscopy at a Family Reunion

I entered the hospital nervously.  I was hoping to go incognito.  I was getting a colonoscopy and my best friend’s entire family works at the hospital – her aunt, a family friend, her uncle and her parents. I am sure there are more.  I was hoping to escape seeing them as I made my way to get the colonoscopy.

However, as soon as I entered the hospital through the emergency room, I heard a voice call over to me, “Hi.”  It was my friend’s aunt.

I thought to myself, ‘Oh no.  But then again just because she saw me doesn’t mean I’m going to get a colonoscopy.  There are 1000 reasons I could be at the hospital.

I made my way to the colonoscopy lab without running into anyone.  Maybe I’m in the clear.

I went to check in.  The receptionist looked familiar but I’d been associated with this hospital system for nearly two years now and I was visiting doctors quite often so maybe I’d seen her before.  Also, the town wasn’t that big – 30,000 – maybe I’d seen her around town somewhere.

As she was checking my vitals she looked at me and said, “You are Patsy’s friend aren’t you?”

I wanted to deny it.  Patsy?  Patsy who?

I said, “Yes.”

She said, “I’m her Aunt Christine.”

Of course she was.  She had to be related to Patsy somehow.   Now there was no hiding why I’d come to the hospital that day.

I wanted to hide.

Then the door opened.  I saw a covering for fluorescent lighting coming in. Maybe whoever was carrying it could distract her.  But then I saw him and he said, “Hi.”  I was Patsy’s uncle.

They finally whisked me off to the room where the procedure would be taking place.

I laughed to myself that next time I had a colonoscopy I would send out invites to my friend’s family to make sure they knew I was coming to town.


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